Weekend Round-Up
Beneficiary Addresses, Coronations, and Promoter's Remorse: A look back at the past week.
It's taken six weeks, but I am happy to report that I am finally through the worst of mono. Sure, I still tire more quickly than a newborn. But all in all, I am almost back to normal.
Don't ever get mono, guys, especially if you're a 60-year-old woman with Lupus. With everyone focusing on COVID, mono can slip in like a Ninja and derail your life for weeks.
Long story short, this 6-week illness has cut into the time I would spend writing. To make up for the lack of new material, I'm cramming several topics into one column for your reading pleasure.
Let's check out some of the more newsworthy happenings over the past week, shall we?
Operation Don’t Fall Down
Axios reported on Tuesday that the Biden campaign is on a mission to avoid another embarrassing fall by the octogenarian president in hopes that Americans might forget that Biden is an octogenarian president before Election Day.
That very public humiliating fall at the Air Force Academy graduation in June weighs heavy on the minds of Team Biden.
To minimize the risk of another viral moment, Joe is undergoing physical therapy and exercises aimed at helping him maintain his balance and walk without tripping.
On top of that, as we have already seen, Team Biden is making Grandpa use the short steps to Air Force One to avoid a repeat of his oft-repeated stumbles on the longer stairs.
According to Axios, the Democrats fear the "nightmare scenario" of old Joe executing another spectacular face-plant right before the 2024 election.
We all remember Hillary Clinton's humiliating "fall" from grace on September 11, 2016, when she collapsed like a sack of potatoes outside of her Scooby van and had to be tossed into the back like a dead body, and by God, Team Biden will not allow that to happen to their guy!
At this point, short of wrapping him up from head-to-toe in bubble wrap and strapping him to a hand truck like Hannibal Lecter, there is no way to prevent Joe Biden from stumbling or falling.
This is an 80-year-old man experiencing dementia and the physical ravages of age.
Over the last nearly three years, Americans, not to mention the entire world, have seen Joe Biden trip and fall at least half a dozen times. Launching Operation Don’t Fall this late in the game amounts to installing bumper pads and a kid-safe latch to the barn door long after the horse topples to the ground while making his escape.
Speaking of exercising…
"No Evidence" Gets a Workout
The American corporate media and the Democrats were bending over backward and twisting themselves in knots this week to dismiss the latest revelation from House Oversight Committee Chairman James Comer.
Comer revealed on Tuesday that in the summer of 2019, Hunter Biden received wire transfers from Beijing totaling more than $250,000. The beneficiary address listed on the transfers was not Hunter's, who was living in California at the time, but his father's home in Delaware.
The media snapped into action, arguing that wire transfers go to bank accounts, so the discovery that Joe Biden's home was listed as the beneficiary address is a nothing burger. Besides, there is no evidence that Joe Biden personally benefited from the receipt of this money. And not only that, Joe is a loving father who lovingly loves his son who was struggling with drug addiction and can't you people just leave him alone?!
Meanwhile, Hunter's legal team and the White House couldn't get their stories straight.
Abbe Lowell, Hunter's high-powered attorney, claimed that the wire transfers were loans Hunter received from an individual in China, and the only reason Joe's Wilmington home appears as the beneficiary address is that this was the address on Hunter's driver's license at the time.
In a statement on Tuesday, White House spokesman Ian Sams, the go-to spokesman to address the investigation into the Biden family's influence-peddling operation, claimed that the financial records obtained by Comer "show no evidence of wrongdoing by President Biden."
On Wednesday, Sams managed to pull off the rhetorical equivalent of tripping over a sandbag and falling face-first at the Air Force Academy graduation when he posted the following on X:
Imagine them arguing that, if someone stayed at their parents' house during the pandemic, listed it as their permanent address for work, and got a paycheck, the parents somehow also worked for the employer
It's bananas
Yet this is what extreme House Republicans have sunken to
Can you believe this argument?
The money was transferred in 2019. The COVID pandemic wouldn't hit until the following year. Is Ian Sams suggesting that Hunter’s Chinese pals give him a heads-up about the coming pandemic? Or is it just a lie?
I’d guess it’s a big, fat lie since Hunter Biden acknowledged in his memoir that he was living in California in 2019.
In describing the payments as a "paycheck," Ian contradicted Abbe Lowell's claim that the money was a series of loans.
Which is it?
You guys move the goalposts so often that you risk serious physical injury. Might I suggest you stretch first?
As I said in my August 10 column, "Love Gives You Blinders:"
[U]nless there is photographic evidence of a foreign oligarch showing up at Biden's Wilmington house carrying a canvas bag with a great big dollar sign on the side, the news media will pretend this gun isn't smoking.
They can issue all the righteously indignant statements they want. It won't change the fact that, at the very least, the Biden family capitalized on Joe Biden's position as Vice President and future President to cash in big.
If the son of a Republican president, any Republican president, did the same thing, the media would be howling like wolves demanding that Congress impeach his ass. But for Joe Biden, the media reserves its howling for James Comer.
To quote again from my August 10 column:
Joe Biden is the only ticket in town. For good or ill, the corporate media is stuck with him if they want to ensure that the Republicans don't win.
And if that means turning a blind eye to evidence of corruption, bribery, and other high crimes and misdemeanors, then so be it.
Trump Trashes Pro-Lifers … Again
Donald Trump's fatwa against the pro-life movement didn't start this week. He's been hammering away at them for months, desperate to absolve himself of any responsibility for last year's midterm election failures by blaming pro-lifers and not his hand-picked loser candidates for the lack of the anticipated Red Wave.
But this week, Trump launched a line of attack so lacking in self-awareness that when I saw it on X, I laughed myself into a coughing fit.
In an "interview" with pro-Trump sycophant Raheem Kassam, Donald Trump not only took all the credit for the overturning of Roe v. Wade but he also accused pro-lifers of being grifters who are only in it for the money.
Pot meet kettle.
The guy doing nothing to win over voters while raising the cash for his mounting legal fees is accusing the pro-life movement of spending the last 50 years lining their pockets while doing nothing to stop abortion.
The guy accusing the pro-life movement of being nothing but a money-making business is an NFT trading card salesman whose "Trump Wines" emails to this day are landing in my Junk folder every week.
Raheem, gormless tit that he is, didn't challenge a single thing Trump said, primarily because Raheem's "The National Pulse" website is the MAGA equivalent of Fusion GPS, eagerly digging up dirt on Trump's opponents in hopes of easing his path to the nomination.
Donald Trump's decision to saw the limb out from under the pro-life voters who helped elect him in 2016 and voted for him again in 2020 is a tremendously bad idea.
Then again, when you already believe you have the nomination in the bag, winning over voters isn't a high priority.
Speaking of thinking you have the nomination in the bag…
Donald Suffers from Monarchy Envy
After Wednesday's GOP Primary Debate, Donald Trump's campaign demanded that the Republican National Committee cancel the remaining debates.
In a statement on Wednesday that was likely written before the debate began, Trump campaign advisor Chris LaCivita declared the Fox Business debate "boring and inconsequential." He asserted that the debate did nothing to "change the dynamics of the primary contest being dominated by President Trump.”
I know I'm repeating myself, but how is the primary contest “dominated by Trump” when we have yet to have a primary and no candidate has won a single delegate?
Right now, the primary contest is all tied up at zero.
As it happens, LaCivita answered my question in his statement.
He claimed that Donald Trump “has a 40- or 50-point lead in the primary election and a 10-point lead over Joe Biden in the general election, and it’s clear that President Trump alone can defeat Biden.”
Ah, okay.
Like everyone else in Trump's orbit, LaCivita wants the 800 or so people who answer a pollster’s survey months before the primaries begin to decide our nominee rather than allow Republican primary voters to do it.
LaCivita capped off his laughable statement by demanding that the RNC "immediately put an end to any further primary debates so we can train our fire on Crooked Joe Biden and quit wasting time and money that could be going to evicting Biden from the White House.”
The primary process isn't what is wasting money, Chris.
The money is being wasted by the guy squeezing every dime from his fans to pay his legal fees.
Team Trump is determined to clear the field because Donald believes he has a Divine Right to the nomination.
When Trump initially demanded that the RNC not hold any primary debates, I described him as "Hillary 2.0." Like Hillary, Donald Trump expects a coronation, not an election.
Donald must've watched King Charles III's May 6 coronation with a growing sense of envy.
Charles didn't have to campaign for the position. The people of England had zero say in the matter. Why should Donald have to campaign in Iowa, New Hampshire, or anywhere else? He should be handed the nomination just as Charles was handed the crown!
The nerve of those Republican voters who want to go to the polls on primary day and cast a ballot!
The nerve of those Pretenders to the throne daring to challenge Donald!
Why, Ron DeSantis is not different from that deceitful Lady Jane Gray who tried to steal the crown from Mary Tudor!
Don't they know that the nomination belongs to Trump?!
It will never stop being hilarious that Team "Stop the Steal" thinks so little of voters.
Operation Backfire: The RFK Jr. Edition
In April, Robert F. Kennedy Jr., the nephew of former President Kennedy, filed a statement of candidacy with the FEC seeking to challenge Grandpa Joe for the Democrat nomination. However, it wasn't Democrats who applauded the move. Instead, it was the pro-Trump social media influencers.
As it turns out, RFK Jr. was being pushed for months to jump into the race by none other than Mr. Face-For-Radio himself, Trump-lover Steve Bannon.
In an April 5 post on X, CBS News reporter Robert Costa wrote:
Per several people familiar, Steve Bannon had been encouraging this for months and believes RFK Jr. could be both a useful chaos agent in 2024 race and a big name who could help stoke anti-vax sentiment around the country…
Isn't that delightful?
In the months since that followed his entry into the race, RFK Jr. regularly appeared on Steve Bannon’s podcast while other gormless pro-Trump podcasters did the same thing.
Democrat voters may not have liked the 69-year-old Kennedy scion, but the Trump fans were all over him like flies on shit.
The clownish Jack Posobiec, who has yet to master the art of 1-D checkers, promoted the hell out of RFK Jr.'s campaign, convinced that it would undermine Joe Biden's reelection.
Posobiec's X feed was filled with pro-Kennedy posts, including this one from July 17:
The smears against RFK Jr are coming now because Democrat leadership are [sic] terrified of his rise. He is on every media, doing every podcast, and his message is gaining traction faster than ever.
When the Democratic National Committee decided not to hold primary debates, every Trump influencer (who, by the way, all agree with Trump about the RNC debates) called out the DNC for refusing to give RFK Jr. a platform.
Halfwit Charlie Kirk tweeted on April 27:
The most under-appreciated storyline happening right now under the surface: RFK Jr. is polling at 19% with Democrat voters and the DNC won't even host primary debates.
Six months later, Operation Push RFK to Hurt Joe has transformed into Operation Backfire.
Mediaite reported on Friday that Kennedy plans to launch a third-party run for the White House.
Now the nitwits who spent the last six months fluffing Kennedy to their Trump-supporting followers are scrambling to raise the alarm that an RFK third-party run will hurt Donald Trump more than it will Joe Biden.
And why is that exactly?
Could it be because these clowns spent the last six months rallying support for RFK among Trump fans?
Shakespeare described this as being hoist with one's own petard.
Or, as I like to put it, the monster you created just turned on you.
After Mediaite broke the story, Trump’s social media influencers flew into damage control mode.
Jack PromoCodeiec reposted another MAGA account's warning that RFK would take more votes from Trump than Biden, adding this:
"RFK cant [sic] win but he can deny Trump the White House and hand it to Dems"
Maybe you should've thought of that before you spent the last six months selling RFK to your followers, you halfwit.
Suddenly, I am reminded of this popular online meme:
These guys are the most shortsighted people on the Planet.
Anyroad.
I've prattled long enough this morning. I sat down at 6:00 a.m. to start this column and now, more than four hours and 2,300 words later, I think I'll wrap it up.
Have a lovely Saturday!